Tag: Love

Hugs

Posted on by scott

2 (encourage) older women as mothers, younger women as sisters, in all purity. – 1 Timothy 5:2

Niece

Little “Miss” Haddie made her way down the aisle, I am sure, much like she rehearsed. Upon reaching the arbor, it was now time to make a right pivot and take her place on Grandma’s lap in anticipation of the entrance of the bride (Lauren). Funny how things don’t always go according to plan, especially when young children are involved. And sometimes, thankfully so.

As Haddie began to make her move towards her seat as instructed, you could see in her face an internal struggle overcome her. Her mind told her to do as she was told. Her heart told her to give her uncle Trent, the “lonely” person standing under the arbor, a hug before she took her seat. Her little heart won this battle. Just as quickly as she began her right pivot she made an about face and hugged Trent’s leg.

While I will not downplay the importance of following instructions, I was glad to see this young niece follow her heart and hug her uncle. The act was so spontaneous that Trent did not even have time enough to react and reciprocate her hug. With his eyes raised in anticipation of the eventual entrance of his bride, all he could do was place his hand on her head in recognition of her gesture of love before she was gone.

The innocence of her gesture touched my heart, as I am sure it did to everyone who witnessed it. Here was a little girl not caught up in the enormity of the moment. She entertained no ideas about posturing before an audience. Quite simply, out of her love and fondness for her uncle she wanted to express her feelings for him. Plain and simple.

As I witnessed this hug I regretted not having my phone for a quick picture. But as I reflected on it I was certain that is was one moment from the wedding that would be etched in my mind. Little did I know it was a sign of things to come.

Cousin

After the meal, I was sitting with my back to the wall and watching the dance floor. On the near side of the dance floor I saw Trent hugging a young lady whose back was turned towards me. Usually there is nothing unusual about seeing a new bride and groom hugging their guests, but as I watched this embrace it was apparent that there was a special bond between my nephew and this young woman. I wondered what the history was. However I didn’t have to wonder for long.

As they separated and the young woman turned around I realized it was my oldest daughter. Just a few minutes prior she was sitting at my side as we enjoyed the wedding meal!! When did she leave the table? Just as Haddie’s hug ” with” Trent touched my heart, seeing my daughter hug her cousin brought tears to my eyes.

Not only did Trent and my daughter Courtney grow up as cousins close in age, but they grew up as neighbors across the street from each other. During their “formative” childhood years they often played together as very close friends. They spent a lot of time together making snow forts, swinging in our back yard and jumping on Trent’s trampoline among numerous other childhood activities.

Here I watched the the two cousins, the new groom and the young mother of four, celebrating the present and embracing the past. What memories were flashing through their minds? The future will continue to take them down trails that they will blaze with others, but for one shared moment they were saying thanks for the past. As a proud father and uncle I am thankful for the memories I have of their shared childhoods and the privilege of seeing their embrace that testifies of the time tested love they still share for one another.

Mom

After she was ushered down the aisle, it was mom’s (Cathy’s) turn to hug Trent. As she embraced her son before taking her seat, she was able to hold back the tears. The same can’t be said for the family members sitting behind me. Despite Cathy’s dry eyes, the mothers in attendance new the emotions that were prevalent in her mind and heart. Emotions that may have been compounded as she was giving away her “baby”.

Despite the false bravado and big talk I witnessed in Trent as a little boy (an inherent trait shared by most boys), there was always a special place in his heart for his mother. When young Trent needed to be “patched” up or picked up, he knew he could look to his mother to be there for her little warrior. And although she had no inherent fondness for the likes of toads and snakes, Cathy learned to tolerate such treasures as her youngest child brought them home.

As hunting and fishing began to “dominate” his time and attention, Cathy always supported Trent. When he played high school football she not only attended every game but became a student of the sport, learning not only each position on the field but understanding the responsibilities of the different positions. Like the toads and snakes of days gone by, football had no inherent importance to Cathy. But it became important to her because it was to her sons.

I have written before about the special love of a mother. A love so selfless that it is probably the closest thing we will see to the love of Christ on this side of Heaven. To witness Cathy embrace Trent on this special day was just another privilege. As we get older, such signs of affection take on more meaning to us.

Great-Aunt

Although I am not much of a dancer (yes that is an understatement), one of my favorite dances to watch is the one that starts with all of the married couples on the dance floor and ends with just one couple remaining. As the dance progresses, couples are dismissed based on years of marriage until you are left with the couple married the longest. On this particular night, the honor belonged to Jim & Mary Ann Rademacher who have been married for more than fifty-one years.

While this particular dance may be a tribute to longevity, it can also be a picture of life. What begins as a crowded floor all too soon gives way to open space. What happened to the crowd we were just bumping into? The children grow up and move away. Loved ones pass on. As the sister of Trent’s maternal grandmother who passed away “too young”, Mary Ann knows this all to well.

Being the “senior” couple at the wedding, I am sure there are a lot of truths Jim and Mary Ann could have shared with Trent & Lauren. Certainly, they can testify that every day we have to “dance” with our loved ones is a blessing. They know the importance of family. They appreciate the simple things in life. They know the strong bond of love.

As the night drew on and weather conditions worsened the crowd began to disperse. Despite the prospect of dangerous road conditions, I heard Mary Ann “inform” Jim that she could not leave without hugging Trent. She “had” to hug him!! As little “Miss” Haddie reminded us, there is no time like the present to get that hug!

Father

I realize that seeing people hug at a wedding is nothing new. Happens all the time. But around the time of Trent’s wedding I had an interesting conversation with a co-worker who claims she is positive that once our loved ones go to the grave any signs of affection are ended. We will never again see their faces. Never again will we hear them say they love us. And no, we will never again embrace them.

I, however, am confident of just the opposite.

Our Heavenly Father created us as relational beings, not only capable of, but dependent upon love and interaction with one another. By God’s design, Adam was not complete without Eve. He needed a fellow human to love and be loved by. We all do.

On multiple occasions, Paul commands the early church to greet one another with a holy kiss (Romans 16:16, 1 Cor. 16:20 & 2 Cor. 13;12). I realize that such an expression may make us uncomfortable in our culture, but the truth remains: affection is critical. It is an expression of love. Of course, as we are reminded in the passage quoted above it needs to be done in purity. But as the four ladies reminded me at the wedding, we need to express our love. Our Father always does.

“But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and felt compassion, and ran and embraced him and kissed him.” – Luke 15:20

As nice as earthly hugs may be, they won’t compare to those that await us on the other side of the grave.

Garden Sleepers

Posted on by scott

43 And again he came and found them sleeping, for their eyes were heavy. – Matthew 26:43

Sleeping Beauties

Few things in life touch our hearts like the face of a sleeping child. Especially if the child is yours. Whether it is a baby wrapped up in a crib or a toddler sprawled out for a nap on the couch, there is something about their “angelic” faces that just melt us.

Perhaps, as we look into their sleeping faces, we ponder their futures and the potential inside of them. With all of life before them and seemingly unlimited opportunities, who knows what they might do and become? Hopefully, they will clear the hurdles we never could!

Perhaps, as we look into their sleeping faces, we reflect on our own pasts. Certainly their youth, and energy, remind us that we are not getting any younger. Life passes so quickly and it only picks up speed as it does so. If only we could convince the young to take time to smell the flowers. Unfortunately, it is often a lesson learned too late!

Perhaps, as we look into their sleeping faces, we just let God tug on our heart strings with love. Love that melts and overflows our hearts. Love that transcends words and can only be expressed by the simple smile on our faces as we behold our “sleeping beauties” God has blessed us with.

Watchmen

As we looked at previously (http://helpmewithmyunbelief.com/2019/09/16/a-bitter-cup/), when Jesus entered the Garden of Gethsemane on the night of His betrayal, He allowed His three most intimate disciples to enter with Him. Then, Jesus placed these three on watch (Matthew 26:38) as He went further into the Garden alone. During His time of greatest need, Jesus wanted His dearest friends to stay awake with Him. And pray.

Jesus did not ask His disciples to act as His sentries. He didn’t need any. Being omniscient, Jesus knew the danger that was approaching, and accordingly could never be taken off guard. Hence, Jesus’ concern was not that His disciples watch for outsiders, but rather the temptation that lies within. It is a truth we all must learn. Our greatest enemy isn’t without, but within.

As their eyelids are closing in sleep, danger is closing in. Judas is approaching with a kiss of betrayal on his lips and Jesus’ bitter enemies on his heels. Although intimidating in appearance with their torches and weapons, none of these were a threat to Jesus. In fact He was in the Garden to keep His divine appointment with them. However, Jesus was concerned about the threat they would present to His “watchmen”. It is a concern Jesus has always had for those He loves.

41 Watch and pray that you may not enter into temptation. – Matthew 26:41

Weak Flesh

Three disciples, three admonitions, three failures. Such was their night in the Garden. Like the other disciples, Peter, James and John were at the end of a long day and an emotionally charged week. Their emotions must have been threadbare after the events of the week which included the triumphal entry into Jerusalem, the cleansing of the Temple, controversies with the religious leaders and finally the just celebrated Passover. It is no surprise they are exhausted. And Jesus knew the tempter would prey on their condition.

Before Jesus chose Peter, James and John to follow Him, Satan tempted Jesus to avoid the cup and follow him. Satan came to Jesus in the wilderness after Jesus had fasted for forty days. Satan thought he would find Jesus weak and vulnerable after such a fast. He hoped to prey on His weak flesh. But Jesus didn’t just fast for forty days. He prayed. Satan knows when we are most vulnerable. And so should we.

The night is late. Their flesh is weak. And Satan is lurking in the dark waiting to crush them. Yet, despite Jesus’ three warnings to be alert, His dearest friends would fall asleep three times.

For Jesus, the scent of the bitter cup is in the air. The Father is about to “crush” the Son. Jesus is in anguish as He anticipates the terrible wrath of God which He is about to endure. Why must He go through with this? Look no further than the faces of His sleeping friends. Sure they have failed Him, but His love has never been conditional. Knowing He will soon die for them, Jesus makes allowance for their failure.

The spirit indeed is willing, but the flesh is weak.” – Matthew 26:41

Peter

Bold, defiant Peter couldn’t fend off sleep. Not on this night. He rashly told Christ he would go with Him even into death, but here he is during Jesus’ great hour of agony to date; sleeping.

Three short years prior, the ever confident Peter left his fishing boat to follow Christ. Little could he know where Christ would lead him. Jesus was going to shape him into a pillar of the church. But first Satan was going to sift him (Luke 22:31). Temptation was coming. Peter was sleeping. But Jesus was praying. Denial and abandonment were in Peter’s future, but Jesus prayed that Peter’s faith would not fail (Luke 22:32).

What passed through the tormented mind of Jesus as He beheld Peter’s face? Did Jesus shed a tear over Peter knowing what would unfold in the upcoming hours for His self confident disciple?

James & John

Next to Peter, asleep in the Garden, lie the Sons of Thunder, James and John. Known for their fiery temperaments they wanted to call down fire on a Samaritan village for it’s lack of “hospitality” (Luke 9:54). In their pride they wanted the seats of honor in Christ’s kingdom and claimed they could drink from His cup. However, Christ knew their flesh was weak and that their own “cup” was coming. As Jesus beheld the face of James, He saw His impending fate. Herod’s sword would soon make him a martyr.

And how was the heart of Jesus moved when He cast His gaze upon the face of His beloved disciple John? Did He see John faithfully standing at the foot of the cross? Perhaps He envisioned John taking care of His mother Mary in His absence. Although John would outlive the rest of the disciples, he would certainly face his share of temptations and trials, including being exiled to the island of Patmos in his old age.

A storm is quickly approaching, but Christ’s “children” are fast asleep.

No one but Christ could understand the magnitude of the wrath of God. No one but Christ could truly grasp the weakness of flesh of men. Only Jesus could love the weak flesh enough to submit to the will of the Father and drink the cup of wrath to the dregs.

More Sleepers

The Garden was a place of struggles. For the fatigued disciples it was a struggle between their willing spirits and their weak flesh. On this night, the weak flesh won out. For Jesus, it was a struggle over the cup. The time to drink from it had arrived and it’s contents were potent. More so than we could ever begin to comprehend.

In the Garden of Eden, we fell with Adam. In the Garden of Gethsemane, we failed with the disciples. Sleeping when we should be watching. But when Christ looks into our faces, He understands our weak flesh. In fact, He chose the cup and the cross not in spite of our weakness but because of it. Only Deity could endure the wrath of God.

On the Garden floor the blood of Jesus’ sweat is blending with the evening dew. As the gentle breeze stirs in the Garden the scent of the bitter cup wafts through the olive grove. In the darkness is shrouded an olive press reminding Jesus of His imminent death. In the faces of His dearest friends is a reflection of lost humanity and the motivation for His decision ( 1 Timothy 1:15).

Love & Death

On His face in the Garden, Jesus knew He had just two options; drink from the cup or let the cup pass. To drink from the cup meant to endure the Father’s wrath and to experience a “break” in fellowship with the Father as He turned His face away from the Sin Bearer. This was the true punishment that troubled Jesus.

To pass the cup meant leaving sinful man to drink from it and endure the awful wrath of God. Without the intervention of Christ, no man could be saved from God’s wrath. No one knows this better than Jesus. But even the terrible and imposing cup could not make Christ abandon us!

I have gone through great length to try to emphasize the magnitude of the awesome wrath of God for one reason; to illuminate the overwhelming love of Jesus. Faced with the choice of perishing under the Father’s wrath or allowing His “friends” to perish, Jesus chose the former. Certainly, His anguish was great. Under the weight of the “press”, it produced sweat of blood. But Jesus’ love was greater. For His sleeping, weak fleshed friends, He would go to the cross.

With a heart overflowing with love for His Father and His “children”, Jesus emptied the cup. Certainly, as we behold the faces of our sleeping children, our hearts are filled with a multitude of emotions. Thankfully, the most powerful is unconditional love.

Pinions and Plumage of Love

Posted on by scott

 

“The wings of the ostrich wave proudly, but are they the pinions and plumage of love?” -Job 39:13

Reading through the book of Job recently I was struck by this verse regarding the ostrich.  I felt like it was new to me.  This rendering is from the ESV which is quite different from other translations I had read before.  Apparently, the ESV version is the literal rendering.  There seems to be a lot of confusion as to what this verse means.  I am no scholar but I would like to share why I found it so convicting.

Vain Wings

Image doesn’t always match reality.  The ostrich is large.  The ostrich is fast.  The ostrich is not intelligent.  According to this text she proudly waves her wings, but why?  She is a bird that can not fly.  Regardless, she wants to “strut her stuff”.  Sounds like she thinks she is a peacock.  But if she lacks love, her pride is in vain.  Listen to what the text says, “For she leaves her eggs to the earth and lets them be warmed on the ground, forgetting that a foot may crush them and that the wild beast may trample them.” While the ostrich is proudly waving her wings, she is neglecting her eggs.  The ostrich doesn’t know any better, but how often do we imitate her?  The Bible tells us that children are a blessing, the world says they are an inconvenience.  Delay having them. Space them apart.  Limit the number.  You have heard all of this and so much more.  I believe the advice has gone beyond the practical and has appealed to our pride.  Instead of being selfless, the world promotes selfishness.  We are encouraged to wave our wings, but are they the pinions and plumage of love?

Buried Eggs

We leave our eggs on the earth and let the sun warm them.  The ostrich wants the sun to incubate her eggs.  We too want to pass off our responsibility for raising and nurturing our children.  Unfortunately, this reflects our tendency to dismiss our most intimate responsibilities.   We have daycares, teachers, grandparents, and others influencing our children often times more than we are as parents.  Not to mention television, video games, and peers.  Some of these things can be positive, but none of them should replace mom and dad.  By neglecting her eggs, the ostrich exposed them the danger of possibly being crushed or trampled by a wild beast.  How many dangers are our children exposed to?  Some are more subtle than others.  Not all make headlines.  For me, indoctrination is a great concern.  We are responsible for making sure our children are not only properly taught and trained in Godliness (Deut. 11:18-19), but we are to protect them from evil as well.  Protecting their young impressionable minds as well as protecting them physically are equally important.  I am not opposed to complimenting parental guidance, but we can’t pass off our primary responsibility.  When we stand before God, He will hold us accountable for the blessing He has bestowed upon us. Flapping your wings before Him will not impress Him.

Cruel not Caring

God progresses from charging the ostrich with neglect, to downright cruelty.  “She deals cruelly with her young, as if they were not hers; though her labor be in vain, yet she has no fear.”  The ostrich not only exposes her offspring to danger, she is cruel to them. Instead of maternal love and nurturing, there is cruelty.  The lack of intimacy combined with her selfishness breeds cruelty.  She treats her offspring as if they were not her own.  Although she carried and delivered her young, she doesn’t care for them.  Her labor was in vain. The text tells us she acts so, “Because God had made her forget wisdom and given her no share in understanding.”  As mentioned earlier, the ostrich is not intelligent.  God did not giver her wisdom.  That is what makes this so convicting.  How is it that man, God’s highest creation can imitate the ostrich?  How can we be so proud?  How can we be so selfish?  What are our priorities?  What is so important that we are willing to neglect our children?  What dangers are we exposing our children to by leaving them to the earth for warming?  Is it really worth it?

Proud or Loving Wings?

“When she rouses herself to flee, she laughs at the horse and his rider.”  The ostrich isn’t a good example as a loving parent, but she is fast.  While she can not fly, the ostrich can outrun a horse.  When threatened, she relies on her speed for self-preservation. She waves her wings proudly, she laughs at the horse and his rider.  But what about joy?  What good are pretty feathers?  What good are fast legs?  How important is self-preservation when we neglect our children?  If our children are crushed and trampled by wild beasts who are we impressing?   How many eggs are being trampled while the ostrich and horse are running?  Do you have an inclination to proudly wave your wings, or do you have pinions and plumage of love?

4 He will cover you with his pinions, and under his wings you will find refuge… – Psalm 91:4